all jokes have some element of truth

when your friends make jokes about hating themselves, stop them. don’t laugh. i know in the moment it might slip out, but make sure you follow it up with asking them about it. don’t accept a calm, “i’m the worst” tell them, “no, you’re not.” even if they made big mistakes, tell them it’s okay. that they just messed up a little bit. even if you told them before they did it that you thought it was a bad idea: no “i told you so.”

let them know that you don’t agree with the voices in their head. the thing about this is that once they hear you gently correct them, they’ll start to hear how much they say this kind of thing. and hopefully, over time, they can start correcting the voices, too.

i know it’s the kind of joke i make all the time, but the truth is that those jokes are insidious. when you loudly announce, “i’m a waste of space” and other people laugh: they’re agreeing. and it adds up. the thing is: all jokes have some element of truth. and that little bit of truth weighs a whole lot on you.