Nun Jokes

 

Three nuns die and are met by an angel at the gates of heaven. The angel, standing behind a big bowl of holy water, tells them "if you have sinned, confess."

The first nun says, "I touched a penis with my right hand."

The angel answers "Dip your hand in the water, and go on in."

The nun does as told and passes through the gates to her afterlife.

As the second nun opens her mouth to speak, the third nun interferes:

"Can i just gargle some water before this bitch dips her ass in?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

Three nuns die and go to heaven. At the gate, peter is waiting for them and tells them "you have to answer a question to get into heaven."

Peter asks the first nun "Who turned water into wine?"

The first nun responds, "Jesus did!" And bells chimed, angels sang, the gates opened and the first nun entered heaven.

Peter then asks the second nun "Who was in a whale’s mouth for disobeying?"

The second nun responds "Jonah!" And bells chimed, angels sang, the gates opened and the second nun entered heaven.

Peter finally asks the last nun, "What were the first words Eve said to Adam?"

The final nun while thinking about the unfair question says "oh that’s a hard one" And bells chimed, angels sang, the gates opened and the final nun entered heaven.